An Excursion: River Safari

Photo Credit: Ewan's K1 Teacher

This is the third parent-accompanied excursion I had been with Faye since she started playgroup in 2016. I enjoy every school outing with the children and can only count my blessings that I get extended privilege to watch Ewan from a distance on his excursions till this year - Kindergarten 1 - all thanks to his little sister. 

Nursery One is the last year parents are allowed to tag along for outings. So while I can no longer follow Ewan around, I get to because I am entitled to follow Faye on their excursions. An air of melancholy surrounds me as I imagine how I will never be part of their little jaunts from 2018 because Faye would be in Nursery Two by then. 

She is all too grown up for my liking. I was excited about this River Safari trip. And she? She was too! Both Ewan and Faye were looking forward to Friday as if they were going on the trip of the lives. 

Then this conversation made me realise that I am not always necessarily needed.

M: Faye Faye! I am so excited about River Safari. Mommy is going with you okay?

F: Yay! Okay. But I will sit with Emma on the bus. 

M: Ah? Then where do I sit?

F: You can sit at the back.

She is barely three! 

I remember how Ewan was all eager beaver for me to be present at his excursions. How elated he was to find that I was going to be his partner. My daughter is way too independent! I guess this is what they meant when they say girls mature faster than boys. 

The day had arrived and she kept to her promise that mommy should take the back seat. I did and it was a beautiful experience watching her from where I was. She was confident, happy, ticklish and well-behaved with her friends. Well, except for those times she refused to share her snacks with anyone else except her two BFFs. 

Her two favourite friends are Emma and Eliza. They are both non-Chinese. Unsurprisingly, these girls are also the biggest kids in the whole Nursery One cohort due to their ethnic mix. We call them Faye's Bodyguards. *hahah* Naturally, they take care of Faye as if she was a little sister [even though they are the same age].  What I didn't like was how Faye protects her little group with much control. She didn't allow anyone to step into the circle and made it look like a clique. What does a 34 month old know about cliques? It's natural instinct I guess from what I observed today. Something I feel I should educate her about because that is so uncool!

All the kids were holding their mother's hands [those who had their parents tagged along] and mine was holding onto Emma's, Eliza's or her teacher's. There was a moment when she looked lost and instead of shouting frantically for, "Mommy! Mommy!", she shouted, "Emma! Ms Germaine!" She found them and slipped her hand into theirs. I watched on with an impressed smile on my face. 

I was amused to find that I was not required at all during this excursion! Gosh, it was so hard to even take a photo with you!

So I craned my neck longer and looked out for Ewan. He was so excited to see me! He waved, ran out of his group and threw me a tight hug with a, "Mommy!" Ah.... I felt needed. Thanks Son.

It was time for reflections on the bus ride home as I was instructed to erm sit on my own again. I thought about how my children will eventually lead their own lives and I will not longer be their Primary love anymore. I will be Secondary because their families will take precedence over me. Meyer saw no issues with that. In fact, he is looking forward to lots and lots of couple time with me. He added that our children should be given the chance to "grow up" and lead their own lives with their respective families instead of being tied to us forever. I guess I agree. 

But, I don't think I will ring my children to ask, "Are you coming home for dinner tonight?"

Instead, I will tell them, "I miss you. Can I see you tonight please?"

For as long as I can, I want to be involved in their lives. The reason why I am bent on being a Parent Volunteer when they go to Primary School is because I believe "a little goes a long way". School is so much more than just drop-off and pick-up. I want my children to know that they are valued and that I am making every effort to understand them better as they grow up to be responsible [confused] teenagers. 

When you are both grown, remember the hands that cared and nurtured you. Remember that every moment you are not by our side, we will be missing you.

Faye, you made me reflect so much about life with this excursion of yours. You made me realise that you will eventually grow up and lead your own life without me. That this day will come sooner than I wish. It already, sort of, came.

For now, thank you both for always wanting my hugs, my pats, my kisses and me. Crying for me at the break of dawn and fighting to sleep with me at night.

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A stay at home mum, blogging to widen her social life. 
We want to echo the sound of love through our lives to inspire other mothers alike.