Kampong Spirit - Greatness is Kindness

There's a campaign going on right now: Greatness is not having a big house but a big heart. Greatness is not Status, Power or Wealth. Greatness is Kindness. 

I experienced Kindness [first-hand] from strangers on our island yesterday and I am feeling extremely grateful. Yet, I do not know who they are to thank them wholeheartedly. 

Thankful regardless. 谢谢。Terima kasih. நன்றி. All four races were there to help Faye and I.

Yesterday morning, I woke up as usual to get the children ready for school. But my menstrual cramp hit me unusually bad and I had to leave it to the husband to get them all changed. Every morning, we would send the children to school as a family. It is a privilege for parents to wave goodbye to their children and it warms the hearts of the children to see us there as they enter the school gate. We never miss a day. 

Yet, I had to give it a miss yesterday. I wasn't felling quite right.

I told myself I had to eat my breakfast no matter what. Or else, I'd never be able to make it to pick Faye and Ewan up after school with all that loss of blood. So I did! I had a piece of pork floss bread with butter and a glass of milk. Isn't that enough?

Apparently not. 

When I picked Faye from school, we had in our plans to hit the supermarket to get ingredients for our beef stew dinner and McDonald's for lunch. 

It was 12.20pm. We held hands and chatted, walked towards the supermarket when I suddenly felt breathless and light-headed. I spotted a chair beneath that void deck we were walking past and told Faye I needed to sit down for a bit. 

I didn't realise that sitting down wasn't going to cut. I ended up laying my head on the table because I couldn't hold it up anymore. There sitting with us, was Faye's school security guard. He goes there every day for lunch break with his packed lunch. I managed to say, "Hi uncle. I need to sit and rest. Not feeling well."

Faye was hanging around me and I heard uncle asking me if I needed help. I panted in between breaths and asked him to help me check if the clinic opposite us was opened. I felt like I needed to lie down to feel better. The clinic would have a bed. 

So many things went through my head as it spun. 

"Will I be able to walk another 400m to the supermarket after this? Gosh I need to lie down. Will I be able to walk back to Faye's school's sick bay? Maybe they have a bed there. Can I recover fast enough to pick Ewan up from school too?"

The answers to all the questions were No. 

I called Meyer with all the might I had before I totally went out. "I cannot make it Meyer. I'm feeling faint. You've gotta come right now."

In the background, I heard Faye's security guard speaking to me but I couldn't reply him anymore. A slight nod was all I could manage with my head on the table. 

"Mdm, the clinic is open. I will bring Faye back to school and let the teachers take care of her." he said calmly. 

He stopped a passer-by, "Excuse me Mdm. Please take care of this Mdm. She is not feeling well and I am bringing her daughter back to school for safety." Thank you.

She said Okay and I started to feel nauseas. I turned around facing the floor trying to vomit but nothing came out. Instead of feeling disgusted, this lady put her hand on my back to give it a little pat. Thank you.

I plonked my head back onto the table and I heard another male voice speaking to me loud and clear, "Mdm. Are you okay? I am a policeman and I will be calling an ambulance." 

In my mind, I was going, "Nooooooooooo! Don't call the ambulance please. I am just feeling woozy and will recover in a bit. Just bring me to the clinic. There's a doctor there." But I couldn't speak. I managed with all my might a slight shake of my head but I guess he didn't see. 

The lady who was standing by my side never left me and when I felt slightly better, I attempted to stand. Because I wanted badly to get to that clinic rather than the hospital! She held me by the arm but I couldn't manage more than five steps. Just before I dropped to the ground, another man scooped me up and carried me all the way to the clinic. He placed me on the waiting chairs and I just lay there with my eyes closed. Thank you.

The policeman came next to my ear, loud and clear again, "I am a policeman. I've called the ambulance and they are on the way. Where is your daughter? Where was she brought to? Can you give me your husband's contact number and I'll call him now." Thank you.

After lying down and my blood pressure started to come up, I could respond to his queries in between pants. I gave him Meyer's telephone number and heard him calling Meyer immediately, telling him where I was and that our daughter has been taken away by a security guard. 

I heard the clinic nurses registering me, the clinic's doctor checking on me and going, "Where's the ambulance! Why are they taking so long!"

Feeling irritated, I forced my eyes open, "I don't need an ambulance. You are a doctor right? You are enough."

She was stern too, "You can't possibly be lying here all day right?"

*hahha* She must have met with many denial patients in her line of work and now, yet another. Thank you.

My husband and paramedics arrived at the same time [I think since everything was bit of a blur]. I saw Meyer going away with the policeman while I was being attended to. Meyer later told me that the policeman told him to go check if Faye was safe at school and he followed him to make sure of that. Thank you.

I didn't get to see everyone's faces and I wouldn't be able to say Thank You if I do bump into them again in the neighbourhood. 

Three paramedics were with me at the clinic and one team leader who spoke to me throughout. He was so kind, so good and so professional, I knew I had to send in a commendation for his work. I cannot remember his full name but I kept reading his name tag inside my head to will myself to remember, "Khairul... Lentor Ambulance. Khairul... Lentor Ambulance." 

He was so assuring and calm throughout, explaining to me that I had hypotension i.e. low blood pressure. I was reading at 86 when I came to - normal blood pressure is between 90 to 120 and normal people are reading at the 100s? I managed to say, "Oh.. 86 is not very far from 90 ah? Not so low lah."

He laughed and told me 86 is when I've come to and sitting up. When I went into vertigo earlier on, it could have been lower and that's why I was feeling dizzy. 

We sat and waiting for a bit as he continue to check my blood pressure. It was going up and I was happy to note that I was sitting up. Then he suggested I followed him to the hospital. If I don't want to go with him, it's okay! Later Meyer will have to bring me. He said it with a smile and not at all forceful or demanding. It was of care, concern and kindness. Thank you.

I teared. I don't know if I teared because I didn't want to waste everyone's time and resources or because I was scared or touched. 

I went to the hospital with the paramedics in the ambulance. When Khairul asked me if I had similar incidents happening before, I told him not really. In recent months, I've had menstrual cramps that were getting more painful than usual but I've never lost it like that before. 

Then I started recalling:

- I've had several episodes of this during my first trimester carrying Ewan. Walking, panting and then blacking out.

- I did require iron infusion straight into my blood during my pregnancy with Faye because I had iron deficiency and couldn't absorb the iron from tablets.

- I had postpartum haemorrhaging when Ewan was 6 days old and went into seizure [Read: Birth Stories by Dad].

Wow. I actually had many loss of blood and low blood pressure episodes since my first pregnancy. So there, I had history actually. But low blood pressure is not as serious as high blood pressure lah right?

The doctor at A&E finally saw me and he diagnosed it as a mix of blood loss and dehydration. He suggested I took menstrual pain medication which I had never in my entire life because what's that small cramping pain man? I can handle it. But he was saying it could also be the cause of me going into semi-conscious state. Pain can do that too. Hmmm.... I had usually light flow yesterday actually so sigh.. it is a combination of quite a few things yes.

Well, that aside, this is all about the Kindness I've received all of yesterday.

Ewan and Faye showed me so much compassion yesterday, I suddenly felt like I've done something right parenting them. I would think they would be indifferent at four and six but so thankful they went out of the way to do little things for me to make me feel better. 

I heard Ewan's voice before I saw him when they came straight from school to A&E. "Where's Mommy? Ah There! Mommy! Are you okay? 妹妹 told me you were in the hospital and I asked why? She say because you losing blood."

Faye was looking at me with her loving eyes, touching my face with her palms. They watched cartoons from the TV above and she kept turning her head to check if I was alright. I'd give her a smile and she would return me with so much love in her smiles. Thank you.

When they came back from their lunch with Meyer, they hopped right to me and said they told daddy to buy me chicken rice because they know mommy loves chicken rice! I was feeling all warm and fuzzy inside because I never thought they would notice what I actually liked. Thank you.

Ewan offered to push me on the wheelchair when we were going home. When we arrived at the carpark, he carefully locked the wheelchair, Faye got off me and held my hand as I stood up, and oh dear goodness gosh! Ewan picked up my bag from the wheelchair and carried it for me while Faye held my hand. Thank you.

In my mind, I was going, "Heng ah. My children got heart [有心] and are concerned for me. Next time when I get really old and need to visit the hospital regularly, I have some kind of dependents." *hahha* 

Back at home, I received hugs, drawings, tender palms touching my face and loving eyes looking into mine. Faye even carried a pillow and blanket out from my room when I had my dinner! She placed the pillow on my back and covered me with a blanket. Then she stood back and looked rather pleased with her Doctor pretend-play. Thank you.

We asked Faye if she was scared when she saw mommy going down and feeling weak. 

Her response was, "No." This cool cucumber simply took her favourite security guard's hand and went back to school as he said. 

I asked Ewan what would he have done if he was the one with me instead? He shared that he would be scared but will take my phone and use the emergency call to get help somehow!

Good. Good. They took to heart all the things I've actually said to them - Be Kind. Extend Help When Needed.

Thank you for all who came forth to help yesterday and for all the "How's your wife?" directed to my husband this morning when he sent the kids to school. From the coffee shop aunty [gosh, so embarrassing I even became a spectacle at the coffee shop] to the security guard, to Faye's classmate's grandma who suggested I ate Chicken heart *hehe* and more. Thank you.

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How am I this morning as I write this piece? Mmm I am little light-headed still and I couldn't send the kids to school today as well because I'm slightly breathless. But will attempt to fulfil birthday breakfast set some time back for a friend and pick the kids up from school! It's just cab - eat - cab - kids - home. Shouldn't be too tough right? In any case, my husband has the same call time as an ambulance. He came just as fast yesterday when I called him *smiles*

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